Sometimes, you piss the universe off by wanting something. I wanted a fresh start on a proof/work that I had recently completed, and for the sin of thinking, “hey, this isn’t good enough, so fuck all of the work I’ve done it I’m going to go back to drawing board,” my computer’s hard drive decided to corrupt like a DC politician staring down easy bribe money.
“Oh, you wanted a fresh start? Cool, I’m going to send you back to January! Suck the hellish nightmare of blankness! Loser!”
January was the last time I backed up my hard drive, and knowing how bad I am at doing essential tasks, it’s a miracle that I had done it that recently. In January, I hadn’t even started this new book, and many other things (finished things) were nothing but figments of potential/post-it note ideas.
So, be careful what you wish for. Thankfully, I’ve been off work, and I had the time to kind of rally myself and rebuild the book. I’m also thankful that I had lots of physical copies of pieces of writing. It means a whole lot of retyping, but better that than the blank page. I swear, there is no way to get something back to the state you assumed it was at when you finished it; poems that were flawless masterpieces ready to be released, are now merely okay, because I can’t remember more than a few lines from the original word document that my hard drive kicked into the sun.
So, here’s a reminder to back up your files, right now.